Monday, August 13, 2012

I just looked in my spam folder and ...

... what a surprising range of crap there was in there.

One of the lovely things about my husband is that he is responsible for all spiced ham-related matters.  In fact, I only found out we had such a repository when he mentioned it apropos some email we actually wanted several months ago.  Thus, I have never actually looked in a spammery before.  I just looked - we got about 10 items yesterday alone.  Is this big?  Is this small? Who knows!

I was somewhat surprised at the sheer range of it.  Going from general discussion I thought it was going to be all penis-enhancements, viagra and cut-price deals on wives available today.  There was certainly some of that but so much else - who knew I was so employable, for one. Not just job offers, but all those people who apparently live near me, or want to sell me imaginary financial products.  I have no idea who Anthony is, successful or otherwise, and I am pretty confident he is lying when he tells me he wants to pay me some money.  Does your mother know about this business, Anthony?

I think my favourites contain a plea in the first line, "Please click 'not spam' if delivered to spam folder."  Bad luck!  They look like spam, they smell like spam, and should I have a dog I wanted killed who was willing to try it, they probably taste like spam.  "I am sorry it's your dying breath little feller, but was it faintly porky?"

I dream of summer

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